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Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Jake Furie Lapin: Some Cock for Kara?: Part 2

As Kara invited me into her house, I was suspicious of her motives. I suspected she wanted more.

When we went inside the house, things got intense.  She poured us both some wine and we started chatting. I told her about some of my sexual history, including the stories of Elaine and Tina. I had mentioned Elaine to her before, but Kara was a great listener and this time I went into more detail about my experiences.

I wanted her to open up too, so I asked her when she had known that she was a lesbian and that she didn’t like men anymore.

Kara said that when she was younger she had been experimenting with her sexuality. She had spent some time on a rich man’s yacht, boating along the Jersey Shore in the summer.

At the time,  she was the only woman on board, with several young guys in their twenties.

“What were they like?”, I asked.

“Oh, they were mostly really good guys. Young, fit and hot. I liked almost all of them, except for one. He was a real asshole. I could smell it on him.”

“So what happened?”

“I agreed to have group sex with three of the of the guys, the ones I really liked. But the fourth man, the one I really despised, decided to force himself into the group sex. We were all pretty drunk, but I still was really clear about not wanting to be with him. I specifically told the extra guy that I didn’t want him to participate or to have sex with me, in any way.”  Kara’s eyes were full of pain as she told the story. I put my arm around her.

“So, he didn’t listen?”

“No. It…it ended up being something very similar to a gang rape, because the other men – the guys that I thought were my friends -- didn’t stop the other guy from being part of the sex act. I was telling them “no” but and I was basically forced to have sex with all of them at the same time. “

I was really shocked and sad for her, but I asked her why she hadn’t fought back and tried to wrestle her way out of the situation. Kara was a tall, sturdy girl; she was extremely athletic and could take on most guys.

“Oh yeah?” She said. “You think I should have wrestled my way out?”

“Uh huh.” I nodded.

“Kinda like this…?”  Smiling, Kara grabbed me and started wrestling with me. We fell back onto her couch.

I realized where things were going. “Kara, I need to tell you something.”

She pulled back. “What?”

“This reminds me of my first threesome experience. That was also with a lesbian, or two, actually. And honestly, I kind of felt used. I don’t think that we should have sex unless it’s really meaningful.”

Kara was surprised, but agreed with me. She brought out some bedding and set up the couch for me to sleep on.

In the morning, I was amazed to wake up and found that my hands had been bound above my head, and a blindfold had been placed over my eyes. I could smell Kara’s perfume and feel her stroking my abs.

“Kara…this feels amazing, but like I told you, I don’t want to do anything unless it’s meaningful.”

She whispered in my ear, “Oh, this will be meaningful, Jake. You’re a first guy I’ve been with who really respected me.”

I felt a little nervous. “Should we use a safe word, or something?”

She laughed a little. “No. This is going to be so amazing, I am going to fuck you so good, that we won’t need a safe word.

She proceeded to go down on me, making my cock stiff by licking and sucking me with her mouth and lips before she climbed on top of me and rode me to climax. She did other things to me, that I could never put in words, it was incredible. She had made her own line of candles called "Pride Candel", and took one of them and proceeded to drip hot wax on my body, along my chest down to my waist, torso, cock, and balls, often quietly giggling at my pain. At the end, she released my hands but kept me blindfolding, head resting on my chest, hands caressing me.  I held her firmly, we both knew, a night, a moment, never to be spoken about in public.

We stayed great friends afterwards, often hanging out and joking around with each other. We never really talked about it, but I knew we would never be together again sexually, and she told me on several times that if she ever chose to be with a guy again, it would be me.


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Friday, December 13, 2013

Jake Furie Lapin:Some Cock for Kara?: Part 1

During my career in IT, one of my main clients would often send me to his own home to make sure that the home computer was connecting into the office network. He had been married once before (a story for another time) but was now remarried. His new wife was often at the house when I was fixing the computer network there. One day I was working in the office and I noticed a photograph that was beautifully framed next to the computer. In it there was an incredibly attractive woman with a great smile. I asked my client’s wife, “Who is that?” She told me that it was her sister.

Intrigued, I asked if her sister was seeing anyone, or was single. With a laugh, she replied,

“Oh, she’s single. But I’m not sure that you’re her type.” 

And with that, she winked at me and walked away.  At that point, I really wasn't sure what she meant by that, I was slightly hurt by her blunt statement, but I just let it go.

Three or four weeks later, my client asked me to set up another computer, this time at his office building. He told me it was for a new company employee. Imagine my surprise when I walked in and saw the girl from the photo! The new employee was his wife’s gorgeous sister.

I couldn't help but strike up a conversation with her, and discovered that she was as personable as she was beautiful. However, as we chatted, I started looking around her office and had a startling realization. All of the art on the walls and the books on the shelves gave something away. It slowly dawned on me: she was a gay! The dead giveaway was the gay pride flag that she proudly pinned on her cork board. That is what her sister had meant by ‘not her type’.

Fortunately, I realized this fact in time to keep from making a fool of myself, and Kara and I actually really hit it off. Starting that day, we developed a close friendship and would often spend time together after work, shopping at the mall, getting lunch talking about our dates, and even partying at clubs in Manhattan.

After three or four years of friendship, while Kara was in a serious relationship with another woman, she and I decided to go to a particular club in the city. At the club people were playing with glow sticks, the type that you can wear around your neck, and smaller ones that people passed around orally. Some of the girls, including Kara and her girlfriend, started passing around tiny glow sticks with their teeth. All the girls involved were other lesbians who knew Kara. The game of passing the glow sticks was just between them, and they
would leave me out of it, and I would slowly tip toe my way to the bar as they flirted with each other. But as the night went on, we got more and more drunk, at then Kara levitated towards me and surprised me by passing a glow stick to me with her mouth, kissing me in the process. This happened few different times, and initially I wrote it off as drunk friendly fun. The final time it happened, as Kara passed the stick to me she actually kissed me more passionately, with a little bit of tongue. She then nibbled on my bottom lip. It was obvious to me that something more was going on.

To avoid hurting our tight friendship, I excused myself from the group, and made my way to the clubs unisex bathroom.  It was a large 40 x 80 room, with urinals on one side, and stalls on the other side.  Drugs were prevalent in the club, "E" or "X" or cocaine were often the site.  I never used the urinals, as often gay men would always look over and make you feel uncomfortable, so I waiting in line to use the stall.  When I entered inside, and finished urinating, I cleaned myself, and turned around to exit the stall, to find a short drunk girl staring at me.  She had sneaked in the stall with me, and she said, 

"I've been watching you all night dancing with those hot girls, I want to suck you, pull your pants back down, and let's fuck now in the stall." 

I smiled, and said

"Listen, ummm, I am gay, we are all just hanging out having a good time, is that ok?" 

I don't know why I said that, as Kara's kiss was still fresh on my mind. 

"You ARE gay!!, How can you turn this down?" she proclaimed in big disbelief.

Indeed she was hot, great body, beautiful hair, skin, and eyes...but, just to fuck me like that without knowing me, was a big turn off.  I pushed her drunk ass aside, and kissed her on the forehead and said, 

"Listen, there are tons of guys here, I'm sure someone will want their dick sucked, just not me."  

I exited the stall, and as soon I as left, Kara was standing right outside, just looking and laughing at me, nodding her head.

On our way home, I shared a cab with Kara and several other girls back to Hoboken, NJ, where I left my car to drive everyone home. We dropped the girls off one by one and she and I were left alone together in the car. When we arrived at Kara's house, she looked over at me and gave me that look, that special look, that ‘fuck me face’ we all joke about. I recognized it immediately.

"Jake, you are way all over the road, come inside, the alcohol is hitting you hard.. " she whispered in her drunk voice, holding my wrist

"I love you as a friend, you have been amazing to me, and I don't want to lose you."

I was unbelievably shaking, and sheer butterflies ripped through me.  We were both heavily drunk, and both had the attraction to each other. My mind told me to leave, my heart told me to stay.  I paused and stared at her eyes and I knew I had to say something smooth soon.


What happens with Jake and Kara? Find out in the next blog…

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Friday, November 1, 2013

Jake Furie Lapin:Realized and Unrealized Sexual Fantasies: Part 2

So…what is my unrealized fantasy? To answer this, I have to describe a little bit more about Jake’s journey through life.

There was a point when I was very unsure of myself, back in the days when I identified more as a sub than as the loving Dom I am today. I had a lot of insecurity and uncertainty about my physical appearance, and this bled over into the psychological side of things as well. In The Spice of Life,  I explain in detail how I was transformed in every area, from losing weight and becoming fit to developing my sexual prowess and transitioning from into life as loving Dom. But suffice it to say, I was not always bold, brave and confident as I am now.

I laid in the tub, to truly ponder, what is it that I really want? When it was me and "her", we talked about "our" fantasies, and 3 of them come to mind.  We talked about being blindfolded and tied, tracing her body with a piece of rough cold ice, from her arms, shoulders, neck, cheeks, mouth, her luscious lips, down her chin, neck, perky small breasts, nipples, sides, legs, to finally arrive to her clit...pause, then retrace the same path of the molten water with the tip of my tongue.  We talked about me sitting a bar, gazing into the lively crowd, drinking my red wine, and her finding me, brushing up against my crotch with her mini skirt and sitting on my lap, pretending to be picking me up for a hot date.  We talked about kissing and making out for hours, just laying there in my Hoboken studio condo, watching the electricity of the Manhattan skyline all night.  But that never happened.  It's Thursday night, our date night.  She works till 9:00 pm, and I obsessively stare at my phone, hoping to hear from her.

It's 9:15 pm, I get out of the tub, dry off, and just wear my Yankees PJ bottoms.  Barefoot and shirtless, I walk to make our dinner.  Porterhouse for two, grass fed, veges, and a baked potato, always making enough for company, as I was taught.  I pour our drink, Figenza vodka and organic cranberry juice..helps take my edge off, this is how 520 should have been.  They say it's hard to wait for something that may never happen, it's so so hard when it's everything you want.  They say to turn the page and start a new chapter in your life, to move on.  I don't want to. It's all words and great advice, just no one tells you how to do it. It's ironically funny, you work hard for years, you get the game you need, the body everyone wants, and not have the desire to share it but with only one.  I forego my happiness to see hers, that's how it ended, and that's what true love it all about.

It's 9:45 pm, I set the meal.  Pour my red wine, Malbec. I sit down, and stare into the skyline, and it's a text. {V} 520 . The door bell rings, and I walk over confused, and it's her, the hazel-eyed Vixen. She's dressed in her lacy top and skirt, and in her soft sexy voice, she asks if we can talk as she slowly scratches my bare ribs with her pointy red nails.  A sweat and shake earthquakes down and inside my body, and I calmly invite her in.  Over dinner, she tells me again how things are improved and better for her, and I tell her my usual lies, how I've moved on emotionally, how I am happy she is happy, and how I found a way to remain "just friends" in my heart.  She knows, but she also knows I won't admit it.  She excuses herself to go to my bathroom.  I'm trembling, and it seems like slow motion as she walks back to the table.  She reaches over and hands me her panties, and tells me tonight, we will be more than "just friends".

It's 2:00 am, and I suddenly wake up in my tub again, confused.  Body pruned, it was no dinner, no text, it was just a dream, another wasted night I could have went out but just consumed it with thoughts of her.


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Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Jake Furie Lapin: Realized and Unrealized Sexual Fantasies: Part 1


Many of my readers, including members of the @TSOLVixens Twitter group, have been curious about some of my realized and unrealized fantasies.  There are many facets to both, of course.  In this blog, I will explore and divulge some of my realized fantasies, while my next blog (Part 2) will describe some of my unrealized fantasies.


I've done pretty much what most women have fantasized about, and in essence have been the conduit for them, including MFM, MFF, indoors in taboo places, BDSM in all forms, etc, all of which will be exposed in the series.  Having sex in the great outdoors is a common fantasy, and one that I've shared.  I have had the privilege of participating in many incredible experiences with my lovers.  One in particular stands out to me. Several years ago, at the height of my online activity, I met a woman and we agreed to meet each other face to face in Atlantic City, at the Bor Hotel.  She was the VP of Entertainment for a competing casino, which made it all the more wilder.  This particular casino hotel had a parking deck that reached about 15 stories with a view of all the casino hotels facing the ocean.

I remember that it was a gorgeous, warm summer evening, with a sensual light breeze.  My date and I met at a local wine bar to get to know each other a little bit and establish whether or not there was chemistry between us.  The chemistry was absolutely there, and by the end of the night, I could see that look in her eye: the look that said, “Yes.”  That look. We walked slowly back to the hotel, flirting.  On the way, she told me that her fantasy had always been to have sex at the top of a parking garage, where she could feel free and open to the entire world.

I was happy to oblige, and we soon found ourselves in my convertible at the 15th level of the parking garage.  We started kissing, and I slid my hand up underneath her mini skirt.  I was pleased to find that she was not wearing any panties, was completely clean shaven, and was already wet for me.  I slipped one finger, then two, inside of her, while I kissed her neck and sucked on her earlobe.  She started to moan and buck her pussy against my hand.  Then, suddenly, she whispered, “Let me go down on you.  I need you in my mouth.”

I leaned back and she deftly unzipped my jeans and drew out my cock.

“My god, you’re HUGE! she moaned.  “I love going down on a massive cock.”

She licked and twirled her tongue up and down the head of my cock, and then began to suck my shaft and balls.  She was amazing at giving head, and after 20 minutes, I knew I was about to cum, HARD.

“I can suck on this cock all day” she said .“It's sooo beautiful, and STIFF!!”

Grinning, I asked “Where do you want it?”

She simply grinned back up at me, drew back, and opened her mouth, sticking out her tongue, before wrapping her warm, wet lips around me again.  I grasped her head in both hands, thrust hard, and finally exploded inside her sweet, hot mouth and throat.

She moaned with pleasure, licking her lips.  She then drew my hand back down to between her naked thighs, eagerly, and this time she rocked herself to a fierce climax, soon cumming all over my hand and gushing fluid down my fingers and wrist.We fooled around more after that, for several hours.  It was an incredible experience, being free and open underneath the sky, and the possibility that someone could come around the corner and find us exposed there at any minute just made it better.  There is more to Beth that I won't reveal in this blog, except in my chronicles book, however this incident broke the ice for a few more crazy adventures in Atlantic City with her.

That experience is one of my favorite “realized”  fantasies that comes to mind.  As I mentioned, there are many more, though.  I've had numerous other encounters outdoors, including my lover Jade, who adored having nude photos taken in different locations outdoors and is described more in the book, "The Spice of Life"

Of course, in the list of my “realized” fantasies, I've also experienced both sides of being a sub and a Dom in the bedroom and have passionately pursued my journey from being submissive to becoming a Master and loving Dom.

As for my unrealized fantasies…there are plenty of those, too…But the biggest one will shock and amaze you.

What are Jakes unrealized sexual fantasies? Find out in Part 2.

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BOOK "THE SPICE OF LIFE"

Saturday, October 26, 2013

Jake Furie Lapin:The Butterfly: Jake's High School Prom Part 2


Tina’s massage and her tongue flicking my nipples was intensely arousing to me, but I suddenly became scared at the thought of damaging my friendship with her, and with her brother.  I sat up a little and pushed her away, gently.

“Tina…I, I just don’t know about this.  It feels weird.  I mean, I like you a lot and everything…but…”  I trailed off.

She smiled.  “What is it, Jake? Aren't you enjoying this?”

“Well, yes…but we've had so much fun hanging out.  I just don’t want to ruin our friendship or anything.”

Tina laughed.  “Oh, Jake.  I really appreciate the fact that you would even think of that! You’re so sweet! But don’t worry about it.  I like you too, and I value your friendship, but this doesn't have be anything more than a little bit of fun, between the two of us.  Are you cool with that? If you are, I am.  I promise.  I want you to see me as your little butterfly.  Can I be your butterfly, just this once?”

I couldn't resist, and simply laid back and pulled Tina’s head over me.  She bent down and started kissing me, slowly and passionately.  Still being quite inexperienced, I let her lead, and she gently probed my mouth with her tongue, alternating between playing with my upper and lower lips with hers, nibbling softly.

Tina then unzipped my jeans and drew out my cock.  She gasped a little and her eyes widened, as she took in my size.  She stroked my shaft and teased me with her mouth a little, licking and sucking up and down my cock.  I moaned and laid back, running my hands through her hair.

Eventually, she drew back and suddenly stood up.

“Where are you going?” I asked.

She replied, “I just need to get something out of my bag…” She went to her suitcase and drew out a long, silk scarf.  She came back to the bed and began to wrap the scarf around my eyes.  I stiffened a little, and she drew back.

“Is everything OK? Do you mind if I blindfold you?”

I was remembering Elaine.  It wasn't that I minded so much, it simply brought back a flood of intense memories.

“Um…it’s OK.  It just reminds me of something.  Can you just not use them and watch you enjoy me?”

Tina smiled again, and her eyes were soft and inviting.

“We don’t need to use it then.” she whispered.  With that, she lay the scarf aside, straddled me, and eased herself down over my rock hard cock. I was so hard that my cock was throbbing, aching almost painfully.  Her pussy around me was slick and smooth and incredibly tight. She started rocking back and forth, slowly and surely, leaning forward a little with her hands on my chest.

“Oh fuck, you feel so good” she said softly, “So thick and hard, why don’t you have a girlfriend, this makes no sense…” I knew what she meant, but she didn't understand how the parents always chastised their daughters for even knowing me.  If you weren't Irish American or Italian, you were in the minority in town, as she was being oriental.  Fortunately for her, her father owned the only Chinese restaurant in the area and was well liked. What would her ultra conservative parents think of me and her?

I’m not even sure how long we stayed in this position, but I know it was a while.  Tina took things slow, but I remember watching her face shift and change, as she began to move towards her climax.  It took her quite some time to take all of me inside her, and I watched the slight pain and she pushed to take me in deeper.  She pressed herself against me avidly, hungrily.  But she did something that was new to me: she looked deep into my eyes and held eye contact.  This made the entire sexual experience much more intense and meaningful.

Tina was getting closer and closer to cumming, moving wildly back and forth up and down my shaft, grinding her clit against me.  “Fuck, you are a keeper...” she again softly gasped out saying to me.  “Don’t fucking cum yet, I need to cum please, please just stay hard, I really really need this.” she demanded.  Just as Tina finally rocked forward in one final push and clenched around me in climax, digging her perfectly manicured nails into my back deep.  I let myself go as well, thrust upwards into her, and the rush of pleasure came to the two of us simultaneously.  We both cried out, loudly.  Tina stayed on top and kept me inside her for a few more minutes as she slumped forward, pressing her face into my neck.  Then she finally drew herself off and curled up next to me.  We laid there, for what seemed like hours, just holding each other, not saying a word. We both knew that we could never be together.  It was very intimate, and sweet.

That wasn't our only time together, as we stayed friends and kept in touch for many years afterwards.  Her rocky relationship with Ed went on and off, often with months being apart, and it wouldn't be uncommon for Tina to page me with 612 during her down times (or as cell phones came about, she would text me the same), the date I was labeled her butterfly, for a butterfly session.  She knew I didn't sleep around, and our sessions were always mind blowing, always ending with her head on my chest just wondering.  She even later got a butterfly tattoo on her hip as she got older, and I knew what it meant.  With Tina, my little butterfly, I got my first taste of what intimacy and passion could really be.  I will never forget her, for that reason.


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Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Jake Furie Lapin:The Butterfly: Jake’s High School Prom Part 1

As I've mentioned in previous blogs, I was quite a bit different from my peers throughout high school and as a result, I did not pursue women during those years as much as I did in later years.

However, one very memorable experience did occur around that time; it involved my high school senior prom.

Two weeks before the prom, all of my friends had found dates and I was left wondering if I’d be there by myself.  One weekday afternoon, I went over to hang out with a good high school friend of mine, James.  James was Asian-American, with a Chinese father and a Korean mother.  We’d been buddies for a while.  I also knew his older sister, Tina.  She was a sophomore in college, and it just so happened that she was home for the weekend.  I always had a little bit of a thing for Tina; she was petite, with long, dark hair and incredible dark tear dropped eyes.  Since my experience with Elaine several years before, I had developed a definite taste for older women (a sexual preference that would last for many years, throughout my more submissive stage), and Tina had been the subject of my fantasies more than once.  She often teased us after school getting dressed to shop at the mall, prancing in her underwear.  However, I always respected my friendship with James, and with Tina herself.

That weekend, Tina asked me if I had a date to the prom, and I told her that I didn't. To my surprise, she asked, “Why don’t you take me? I’d love to go with you!”  I was delighted, although shocked.  Little did I know that Tina was in the middle of an ugly breakup with her boyfriend; I found out long afterwards that she had been in revenge mode; seeking jealousy from her ex boyfriend.

In any case, I accepted her offer gratefully.  I didn't take it as any kind of sexual invitation, because of my friendship with the family, but I was thrilled at the idea of hanging out with Tina.

After the prom, it was the "in" thing at that time for everyone to head down to the Jersey Shore and stay there for the whole weekend, drinking and having sexual adventures.  I was still shy and reserved, but having Tina there was amazing, and we spent a lot of time just hanging out and talking, strolling on the beach, walking the boardwalk at night,  just the two of us. The long ride from my hometown to "the shore" would be something that would often occur in my life.

Right before the weekend ended, it was late one evening and Tina and I found ourselves in our room sprawled out on the bed, playing the Chinese tile game,  Mahjong.  Up to that point, we’d shared a bed platonically, even though I had to be careful not to get noticeably aroused sleeping next to her every night.  I even slept between the top sheet and cover so as to have a thin cotton layer between us. But this night was different.  Tina and I began having some very intimate conversations about my time in high school, and my sexual experiences in particular.

“So, have you ever been with a woman?” she asked me.

“Well, uh, yeah. One so far.”

She smiled at me. “And? How was it? Did you enjoy that?”

“I did…but I would like to have other experiences, too.  That one was a little bit…odd.”

Tina’s eyes softened.  Her eyes were vivaciously alive and intense, and really drew me in. I had the feeling she knew of the rumor of how I lost my virginity.

“Well, I can relate to things being awkward.  Sexual stuff can be pretty taboo in Asian cultures, so there was a lot I had to learn too.”

I was curious about her experiences, so I began asking her about Asian culture and we talked for another hour or so.  Tina was impressed how much I knew about Chinese and Korean culture already, including saying basic phrases, such as “Hello”, “thank you” and “please.”  She was equally impressed by my gaming skills and being able to pick up a penny with chop sticks, which all came from hanging out with her younger brother and parents after school.

As the night went on, I noticed she got quieter and quieter and was just looking at me with those intense, dark, almond eyes. Eventually, she reached over and put her hand on my arm.

“Jake, would you like me to demonstrate some Chinese massage techniques that I know?”

I just nodded.  We were both drinking that night more heavily than usual, and the sexual chemistry was definitely there between us.  She leaned over me then and started massaging my chest, gently.  She pushed me back so that I was lying flat on the bed, and slowly unbuttoned my shirt.  I was feeling very aroused, and lifted my hand to stroke her face and play with her long hair a little.  She softly grinned, pushed me back and bent down, brushing the bare skin of my chest with her lips.  Then, suddenly, she opened her mouth wider and flicked my nipples with her little pink tongue.  It felt absolutely amazing.

What happens next between Jake and Tina? Find out very soon in Jake’s next blog…

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Monday, October 7, 2013

Jake Furie Lapin:Follow Your Heart: There’s A Reason for Everything


One of the key lessons I have learned on my journey is the importance of following your heart.  Following my heart has made me the man I am today.  For example, when I was 18, I had a real estate license but struggled.  At that age, I couldn't sell a house or even really show a house, because nobody wants to buy real estate from someone so young.

In any case, at this time there was an Italian restaurant near my house and I used to eat there often.  There was a girl who worked at the restaurant who was a little bit older than I was; I was 18 and she was about 20 or 21.  Her name was Amy; we would talk a lot because I would hang out there for a couple of hours at a
time.  She knew I was struggling as a real estate agent and she told me that she just got a job at a telephone survey place and that they were hiring like crazy, paying top dollar at $12/hr.  I followed her there to apply for a job.  She ultimately wasn't good at the job, but it turned out that I was.  At that place, you really had to be good on the phone.  It taught me how to talk to people, to listen to their voice inflections, how to speed up and slow down, and how to manage the inflections of my own voice.  This is something that has really affected the way I interact with women.  Women love a man who knows how to talk to them and how to whisper those sweet nothings in their ear…

Anyway, Amy eventually went back to the pizzeria.  After about a year, I needed some extra money and they were hiring at the pizzeria, so I ended up working for the telephone survey place during the day and the pizzeria at night.  I still had a crush on Amy, but she was older and could get into clubs and bars and I was still just 18.  I had a car, but all of her boyfriends were from the wealthier side of town and drove Corvettes, Camaros, Monte Carlos, etc. while my car was a Japanese 2 door used.  But still, Amy and I talked a lot and it ended up that I got a job as a dishwasher at the restaurant.  The place wasn't that busy and as the dishwasher, I could spend hours talking to her.  There would be times when it was busy in the front and I’d be in the back washing dishes and have nothing to do, and the 2 Italian cooks in the back would teach me how to cook.  So at the Italian restaurant, I gained another life skill; not only was I learning to talk to people – but the restaurant cooks taught me how to cook meatballs, lasagna dishes, etc.  I don’t think there’s a woman in the world who doesn't think it’s really sexy when a man knows how to cook.  Because I followed my heart with Amy, I gained that impressive skill.

I wasn't making quite enough money between the two jobs and as I got older, I started building my IT career.  When I was younger I was always good at computer games etc., and at one point somebody taught me how to hack phone cards.  I did it in a friendly way; I never stole any money or anything like that, but one
day the FBI showed up in my living room with my computer sitting on the floor unplugged and taped up.  This was back in high school, and at that time the laws were different; you were able to break into company websites and look around and snoop, but the laws today are much stricter. You’re not even allowed to break in.  Anyway, I didn't get into trouble; they just wanted to talk to me, but at that time, the FBI guy told me something very important.  He asked me “Why don’t I use my skills to help companies close up their loopholes, rather than sneaking through them?” His words made a huge impact on me, and I remembered that incident when I was working in the kitchen at the Italian restaurant. As I was getting closer to the age of 21, I had some skills under my belt, and so I decided to pursue an IT career.  Initially, I applied to the ARMY ROTC program, but through their testing, even though I was extremely smart and skilled, they wanted me as a front line soldier.  I asked why, and they had said I had a rare eye blindness, that I can see through camouflage.  This was due to the fact that I had stared at the sun a bit when I was younger, which caused the color blindness, burned my color filters, and actually had raised all my other senses.  I decided to pass being a front line soldier, and went into the private sector becoming the owner of a very successful IT company for about 10 years. But I think today, had I not burned my filters, would I be dead? As a few months after that ROTC recruit, the US had gone to war in the Middle East.  And those raised senses help me in so many ways today.

How does this tie into following your heart? Well, back in high school, when I was learning computers, I had a crush on a girl in my freshman year.  She took a typing class, so I took the same typing class, just to follow her, just like I followed Amy later on.  I was one of only 3 guys in the classroom.  Our typing teacher liked me and he pushed me which really helped because I excelled at that class and I got up to 60 or 70 words per minute.  The teacher recommended that I take a second year.

It turned out that the girl I had followed was sleeping with the whole football team and that kind of turned me off.  But in the class there was another girl, who was kind of shy and very pretty.  We took the second year of typing class together and bonded for a long time.  In that second year, I got up to about 85 words per minute but it was very embarrassing because I was the only guy in the class, and there were about 6 girls, all of whom are secretaries or paralegals today.  There really wasn't any need for me to take a second year of typing.  However, reflecting back now, if I hadn't taken that second year of typing, I wouldn't have aced all my papers in my last year of high school and in college, and I wouldn't be able to type as fast I can when I blog as I do today or email, multitask, etc.  In my IT career later on, I definitely needed to have those fast typing skills for typing code, etc.

Following my heart gave me those essential typing skills, just as it gave me the skills to cook and to talk to people.  Looking back, I think, “Damn! If I didn't follow the girls I had crushes on way back when, I never would have learned how to cook, or how to talk, or how to type.”

I also followed my heart as far as computers go.  My parents were pushing me to be an engineer or a lawyer, but I didn't want to be either of those.  I loved computers and technology and still do today.  This has been a key part of my success in business, as I am my own IT department in many of my ventures, and allows me to care for my subs and the women in my life.

So things really do happen for a reason, if you follow your heart, even though it may not become apparent at the time.

Coming back around full circle, I ran into Amy, the girl I had a crush on in high school, when I was about 27 and she was 30, and I was now very successful in my IT career.  This was before I got married; we were in a famous club in town and she was with her sister.  Her sister had a crush on me but was a total bitch; in the ten 10 years that I had known them, she hadn't changed one bit from being a bitch.  Amy, however, was awesome; she was a total sweetheart.  We had kept in touch sporadically throughout those years; from the time I knew her at the pizzeria when I had my real estate license all the way through my IT career.  I always stopped by and said hello.  At 27, she knew that I had dated a few people already and I was moving on.  At the time, I had a girlfriend that I was pretty serious with.  I kind of regret it now, because that girlfriend ended up dumping me on my 28th birthday.  I didn't know that at the time, though, and that day in the club, Amy pulled me aside and asked me, “Why have you never asked me out? We get along so well!”

I felt like I flashed back to high school; I remember thinking, “Damn, what do I do now; all those female friends that had signed my yearbook, asking the same question.” Little did they know how submissive I was due to the prejudices that existed in town, mainly from the adults.  So I simply told her that I was with somebody at the time.  Sadly, I knew that the person I was with wasn't with me in her heart.  I should have dumped her and told Amy, “You know, you’re right.  What are you doing for dinner next Friday?”, or something along those lines.  That would probably have changed my life, but I didn't do that.  I was very faithful, and I am still very faithful today with my word, but I learned the lesson.  When the opportunity is there, go with your heart and follow your heart.  You might not even realize until much later what the importance of that meeting or opportunity was.

How does Jake keep following his heart along his life’s journey? Check in next week in his business ventures that leads to the ultimate turn of events...

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Thursday, September 26, 2013

Jake Furie Lapin:UnFair Punishment: An Early BDSM Lesson

In the Irish-Italian neighborhood where I grew up, the predominant religion was Catholicism. Because both my parents worked, they had the money to send me to a private Catholic school in town. It was grueling.

Most Catholics don’t realize that Catholicism stems from Orthodox Christianity. The two religions are very close to each other, with similar masses and communion services. Some of the nuns were very accepting of my religion but others challenged my loyalty to my religion many times. Although I was given positions of authority and responsibility within the school, such as collecting lunch money, keeping head count, being a crossing guard, etc. the nuns really challenged and criticized my beliefs. Often, as part of their antagonism, they would punish me for no real reason at all.

One nun in particular, Sister Marie, would come find me when I was working on an essay, or math, or whatever. She would sneak up behind me with one of those old-style long wooden metal-edged rulers, and without warning, would come and hit me in the hand. The reason she gave was always ridiculous, such as: I was holding my pencil wrong, or not sitting up straight, or not doing something the proper way. I still have some of those scars from that ruler on my hands. I also have many other scars from playing hockey in school and punching people in the mouth during typical hockey fights, but a good chunk of the scars are from Sister Marie. Luckily, my hands are tan enough that they aren't too visible, but those scars are there.


Sister Marie kept pushing me and pushing me. I remember one day, when I was about 13, it was confession time in school and she asked me if I needed to go to confession. I said no, and she challenged me, saying “Are you sure? It’s been a whole month. You must have sinned at some point.” I said, “No, I really can’t think of anything. I don’t know if I did anything…I've been pretty good.” This was the truth; I was really a well-behaved guy when I was younger. She said, “ You have to think of something”. With that, she forced me to get on my knees in front of this huge cross that was in one of the hallways. She told me to kneel there and think of something, and then ask for God’s forgiveness. I knelt there and I was thinking, and thinking; she kept yelling at me, “Come on! Think of something! THINK OF SOMETHING!”

 I couldn't think of anything, and eventually the absurdity of the situation struck me and I couldn't hold in my laughter any longer.

 “This is not a joke!” screeched Sister Marie, and she summoned some of the other nuns to join in. Together, one or two of her aged withered cronies and Sister Marie pushed my head down to the ground in front of the cross and held me there.

 Sister Marie pulled the back of my pants down. My naked ass was fully exposed, and protruding helplessly as my face was pressed into the ground. I felt vulnerable, exposed, and strangely excited. Sister Marie always carried a cane with her, and I heard it swish against her hand, making a slapping noise. She leaned forward, next to my face, and said, very forcefully: “You’re a bad, bad, boy, Mr. Lapin! And you WILL be punished! You WILL learn your lesson!” She paused for just a moment and I heard the slap of the cane against her hand again. I clenched my cheeks, because I knew what was coming. The first stroke was a complete shock. For just a second I was numb, but then I felt the sting of it spread across my bottom, as it drew the blood to the surface of my soft, exposed skin. I felt a stinging, hot sensation. A few times she would slap my ass, and massage my whole cheek, as to circulate the blood. It hurt like hell, but it also sent warmth through my whole body, and somehow it also aroused me greatly. In spite of myself, I felt my cock start to stiffen and then become rock-solid. I’ll never know if Sister Marie noticed, but maybe she did. She struck me with the cane again. This time the heat was even more noticeable. I was trying to wrap my head around the fact that I was getting a major erection. I just hung my head in shame, and hoped that all the nuns around me couldn't see my thick penis pressing upwards into my stomach. Or maybe I wanted them to see my huge manhood.

Sister Marie gave me 20 or 30 strokes with the cane, and made a few comments about how my suffering would make me appreciate Jesus’s suffering on the cross, and how my pain would make me a better person, etc. At one point the pain was pretty bad and I said, “I don’t know why you are doing this to me!” Sister Marie replied, “Because you need to be forgiven.” I screamed, “For what? For what?”, but she gave me no answer. I wasn't sure if I was screaming in actual pain, or just as a way to hold my orgasm at bay. 

Afterwards, the nuns finally left me alone. I could barely walk, but I remember going to the men’s room, touching myself and finally ejaculating, HARD. I was alone, and hated the feeling of self-pleasuring myself.

 I attended Catholic school from kindergarten through 12th grade, and my torture at the hands of Sister Marie was constant throughout that time. Once I was walking in the hallway and she passed me and reached out and punched me in the gut, for no reason. This happened often when nobody else was around, that Sister Marie would pinch or hit or kick me. After the confession incident, the pain she inflicted would cause that strange arousal again, and would lead to masturbation. I began to understand the link between pleasure and pain in a profound way.

Sister Marie would threaten me as well, telling me that if I told anyone, she would just call my parents in and tell them that I was lying and making up stories. Of course, because she was a nun, they would believe her, or at least that’s what she wanted me to think. She was probably right, too. My parents were very strict and very religious; they would have been unlikely to take my word over that of a priest or nun. That knowledge gave me more pain than the physical torture from Sister Marie.

As I enter into the BDSM lifestyle, and I administer my punishments and spankings, I always ensure that these are for things that my subs did willfully, transgressions that we mutually agreed that they wouldn't do and I make them tell me why they are being punished. My subs always have to earn their spankings and punishments. I never punish for things that are beyond their control, e.g. if they are late because they were in an accident, or something else came up that made it impossible for them to complete the task at hand. I would never be upset for those things, or punish them in the same merciless way that Sister Marie punished me. I would always make sure to hold and caress them, and make sure they know that I share in their pain and pleasure, and make sure we mutually cum afterward. I only punish my subs when they willfully cross my wishes or instructions. In this way, Sister Marie did teach me a very valuable lesson in BDSM: it’s never fair to punish for events that are beyond a sub’s control.

As a Dom, I always administer my punishments with fairness and love. Check in next week to read about another one of my life experiences along the journey to becoming a successful Dom.

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Monday, September 16, 2013

Jake Furie Lapin:Unexpected Intimacy: Losing my Virginity Part 2

 After Elaine prompted me to remain still, I heard the sound of a drawer open and then felt an incredible sensation on my chest and nipples. Elaine had withdrawn a long leather crop and was teasing me with the tassels on the crop. She drew them back and forth across my erect nipples and the feeling was unlike anything I’d ever experienced before.

I was half expecting her suddenly to snap the whip and make me sting, but she didn't. Instead, I suddenly felt her breath against my ear.

Speaking as DM Zorra, Elaine whispered, “Mikkal, have you been with a woman yet?”

Trembling, I responded, “No, DM.”

I had known that Elaine had a reputation for promiscuity, even though until this point she had been just a friend to me, almost like a sister. I’d heard the rumors though, and she’d even told me about a few of her sexual encounters. I knew that she had a certain “type” that she liked, and I wasn't it. However, she told me later that she was intrigued by my body, as it was so different from those of the boys she usually dated.

In any case, I was still blindfolded but I felt her softly kissing my face. She started by kissing each cheek softly, and then my forehead and chin. The softness and wetness of her mouth really turned me on and I moaned slightly and parted my lips. She teased me for a while and then finally laid her mouth against mine. I had kissed girls before, but Elaine was something totally different. She knew exactly what she was doing and pulled and teased my lower lip, flicking her tongue inside my mouth expertly.

Things were already heating up for me, but then Elaine began her descent on my body. She kissed around the line of my collar bone and neck, and then down the curve of my chest, following the crease in the middle of my abs. My nipples were rock hard, and she flicked her tongue over each of them several times, and then continued to head south.

She reached my waistline and ran her tongue into my navel, before unzipping my fly. My cock was throbbing hard at this point. I didn't even have time to question what was happening before she pulled both my boxers and pants off completely, leaving my erection completely exposed.

She took the crop and ran the leather tassels over my groin area, dipping them into the creases of my legs and flicking them across the length of my cock, lightly.  I moaned, again.

Elaine spoke. Her voice sounded throaty. “Mmmm…Mikkal…you are quite a bit larger and thicker than those Irish boys I've seen before and circumcised!!.” With that, she ran her hand over my swollen penis, and then spoke the words that changed my life:

“Today, Mikkal, you will be christened. By me.”

I then felt a completely new feeling, warm, wet and ecstatic. Elaine was going down on me, wrapping her mouth around my erection, stroking it with her full lips, running her tongue up and down my shaft and over my balls.

It’s a miracle that I didn't cum right then and there, in her mouth, but somehow I held out. Physically, the sensation was incredible. Emotionally, I was a little bit bewildered and confused; I didn't know quite what was happening, or what I should do, but I was willing to let Elaine – or DM Zorra – have her way with me.

After a few minutes, the sensation changed yet again. The warmth and wetness around my cock shifted in a completely new way. I felt Elaine’s hands against my chest, and then her legs wrapped around the outside of mine. I suddenly realized that she was riding me, and my cock was inside her pussy.

Again, I almost came. Elaine must have felt me trembling, because she said, in a sensual whisper,

“Don’t panic, Mikkal. Just stay focused. Don’t lose control; don’t let go until I tell you.”

A few minutes later, I heard her breathing quicken and then her whole body tensed against mine.

“NOW, Mikkal!”, she shrieked, and then I felt her pussy pulse wildly against my cock. I let go then and came hard. Extremely hard.

Afterwards, I felt a little bit lost.

“Elaine…is everything OK? What just happened?”

She reached down and loosened my blindfold, and kissed me lightly on the cheek.

“Don’t worry about it, Jake”, she said, and smiled at me. She was Elaine again, not DM Zorra. Then she helped me get dressed.

“No, seriously Elaine, what does this all mean?”

“Well, it means that until I graduate and go to college, we’re partners. That’s all. Is that OK with you?”

I nodded, mutely. Shortly afterwards, I headed home.

Sadly, my relationship with Elaine was fated to be short. A few weeks after our first encounter, Elaine discovered that she was pregnant. She believed that the baby was mine.


Her mother was furious and even angrier when she heard that I was the father. She forbade us from seeing each other. Word got around town, though, and Elaine and her mother soon moved away.

The incident with Elaine affected me deeply. She had taken my virginity, and done so in a dominant way that left me little choice. I was unsure how to handle myself around women, which led to a very limited dating life. I didn't even have a date to my Senior Prom. Strangely enough, when I look back at my yearbook, I see notes from girls who clearly had crushes on me, but I was too unsure of myself to recognize it at the time.

In my older life now, I celebrate the day when I first penetrate my lover, as I will never forget the day they gave themselves to me. I light a candle on that day, and their birthday, and I always make sure I don't cum until they do, several times.  Sometimes I take a long shower with all the lights off and relive those memories.

Do you feel that Jake's sexual experience was rape or consensual?

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Friday, September 13, 2013

Jake Furie Lapin:Unexpected Intimacy: Losing My Virginity Part 1

Around the time I entered high school, I became very interested in role-playing games. Of these, Dungeons and Dragons was my favorite. I used to play it regularly with some of my closest friends.

My character was a Demi-Elf, named Mikkal. Demi-Elves are half-human and half-Elf; in other words, they have a dual nature. This fit my own personality perfectly; as I grew older, I realized that there were two sides battling against each other inside me. The first side of me was like the elves: compassionate, highly intelligent, quick-witted, physically nimble, and reserved. The other side was very human, and prone to taking risks, being reckless, and disregarding danger.

One late, rainy Thursday afternoon, when I was a sophomore in high school, my friends and I arranged to meet at a D&D gathering. However, three of my male friends had been put into detention at school for engaging in horseplay during gym class. As a result, the only two people who attended our gathering were Elaine O’Conner, whose house we were meeting in, and myself.

Elaine was a junior, but she had been held back a year in elementary school, so she should have been a senior. Since I had started school a year early, there was a three-year age gap between us. Our mothers' had met through school activities, and were friends. Elaine’s mom was divorced, and unlike other parents in town, had no problem with my racial background, so I had spent a lot of time at their house while growing up. All through elementary and middle school, Elaine was like an older sister to me, a sister I never had. Recently, though, I had started to become aware of how beautiful she was. Somehow, I had never noticed before.

Elaine and I decided to engage in a little bit of one-on-one role play while we waited for the others to get out of detention. We always had our gatherings in her bedroom, and this day was no different. The room was already dim because of the rainy weather, but Elaine drew the curtains, dimmed her overhead light to a faint glow, and lit candles throughout the room, a D&D ritual.

Elaine took on the role of Dungeon Master for the session. Her character was a full-blood Elf, named DM Zorra. As Dungeon Master, she told my character, Mikkal, that he encounters a female Elf demi-god who puts him under a spell of binding. With that, DM Zorra lit a few extra candles, and then she bound my wrists with a silken rope, as a way of enhancing the role play. Then she instructed Mikkal to lie down on the bed. The female Elf Demi-God wished to punish Mikkal for being too close to humans, but as a half-human himself, Mikkal appealed the punishment.

“Absolutely not”, replied the female Demi-God. “You have transgressed, and you WILL receive your punishment.”

With that, she declared that Mikkal’s punishment would be five lashes on the chest.

“Remove your shirt, Mikkal”, she said. I, as Mikkal, obeyed, with a sensation of fear and excitement mingled together.

Elaine, or DM Zorra, then bound my hands to the bedposts more securely. She then opened a drawer and withdrew a long, satin strip of cloth, which she used to wrap around my eyes. I felt my breath quicken.

“Now, hold still”, said Elaine.

Mikkal’s punishment will lead to some thrilling and unexpected sensuality. Read more in Jake’s next blog, titled: Unexpected Intimacy: Losing My Virginity – Part 2.

What do you think DM Zorra will do to Mikkal?

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Friday, August 30, 2013

Jake Furie Lapin:Fiery Passion: Almost Burned to Death

When I was 5 years old, my family moved out of Jersey City, to an adjacent blue-collar town, called Kearny.  At the time, most of the population was either Scottish, or Irish, or Irish/Italian, or just Italian. Then there was me: this darker-skinned, exotic breed.  As kids, my siblings and I didn't know or see any difference between our family and other families. In fact, I was always known as the smart, eccentric kid, and based on my surname, most parents assumed that my family heritage was English or something similar.  When I played with friends my own age, life was normal.  However, on the occasions when I was invited over to a friend’s home, the situation changed dramatically.  Racism was strong in Kearny, and the racist parents of my friends knew right away that I was different. I would often see their reactions immediately in the long, disapproving looks on their faces whenever I entered the home.  After they found out more about my different family background, the racism escalated to the point where I wasn't even allowed over.  It soon became clear that the entire town was divided along racial and economic lines.  On the poor side of town, which ran adjacent to Jersey City and Newark, I never had an issue with racism; I was always treated as family by my friends’ parents.  However, once we moved to a house on the better, more affluent side of the tracks, my experiences were far more hurtful, and lonely.

The racism I experienced in those years came to a head one day, when I was 11 or 12.  I was walking with one of my friends, one of the few who didn't mind associating with me.  We were both outcasts, excluded from the popular, rich circle of young teens in our school.  As we were walking, we were spotted by a group of the older, rich kids.  They started shouting insults at us, and then suddenly, they decided to chase us. It was obvious that their intention was to beat us up, just for being "different".

We ran for a while, but they were older, and faster. My friend got away, but they eventually caught me in a small wooded area behind a local bank that was used as a cut-through path.  This wasn't the first time this had happened, so I was prepared for my usual kicking and beating. I struggled and tried to escape, but this time was different.  They held on tight, and then decided to blindfold and tie me to a tree. After I was tied to the tree, the kids laid old branches and leaves around my feet. I could hardly believe what was happening, but it slowly dawned on me that they intended to burn me to death.   Using a lighter, they successfully created the fire in the wood and leaves around me, and at that moment, I truly felt that my life was about to be over.  As the flames rose and heated the air that was entering my lungs, the thugs finally ran away from the scene. I struggled as hard as I could and fortunately, their inexperience with rope tying enabled me to free myself.  I limped home and told my parents what had happened. They reported the incident to the police, but this proved to be fruitless. The police were just as racist as everyone else, and they simply wrote it off as childish bullying, without making any arrests.  The  bullies were never caught or punished, but after that I learned to stay out of their way and to be cautious and careful.

I drive by the tree every once in a while to remind myself how short life is, and how cruel humanity can be.


In my older life now, as I release the ties from my lover, I will always kiss the tear from her fiery eye, and embrace the passion she gives me when I hold her in my arms unbound.

Have you ever been rejected personally or at work because of your race, religion, color, etc?

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Friday, August 23, 2013

Jake Furie Lapin:Soul Connection: The Eyes of a Dying Man


I was born in Jersey City, New Jersey.  Although I only lived there for about 5 to 6 years of my life, I have several vivid memories that date back to when I was a young child.  One of these memories is very vivid, and affected my life in a powerful way.

I lived in a multistory apartment building; my guess would be that it was about 5 stories high, containing maybe about 30 units. My family lived on the 4th floor. The apartments lined the rectangular perimeter of the building, and the staircase leading to each floor revolved around the center, forming a central stairwell.  It was grueling work,  lugging up groceries up to the rectangular staircase to the 4th floor.  One day, I was watching cartoons on a late midweek night.  Both my parents worked very late to make ends meet, so I was being watched by an elderly neighbor sitter, who always just snoozed in the living room rocking chair  while keeping me company.

I was in the middle of a Loony Tunes episode when I heard police sirens nearby, which was common in my part of Jersey City.  They sounded extremely close. I peered out the window to see three police cars parking quickly and sloppily in front of the building.  Then 4 or 5 officers rushed out of the cars and ran into the building.  Being my usual curious self, I walked out of the apartment, and looked down the staircase, watching the officers run up each level like military troopers.  My heart raced, because  they were approaching my level, but then they stopped climbing on the level below mine, and ran to the apartment directly underneath.  I tiptoed down the staircase, just far enough to peer through the banisters and watch them try to break into the apartment.  They broke into the apartment and all of the officers quickly ran into the unit.

All I can remember at that point is one of the officers yelling "STOP", "HANDS UP!!!".  In the next few moments, events seemed to unfold for me in slow motion, as a black man ran out of the apartment towards the staircase.  I heard several shots ring out of the apartment, apparently hitting him.  In slow motion, I watched the man crumple and fall onto his face. It only took a few a seconds, but it seemed like minutes.  As he fell forward, he looked up, and he saw me. His eyes were terrified, and he stared at me, piercing my body and soul. I watched him and our eyes held all the way as he slammed onto the concrete floor. In that instant of connection, I felt his soul touch and enter mine.  In the next moments, all of the officers ran out of the apartment, and one of them peered up towards me, and yelled "Get the F** out of here".  I ran back up into my home, trembling, and deeply changed.

I found out later that the ex-wife of the black man had kidnapped his son, and tied him in a closet in her apartment.  She knew he would come to his rescue, and called the police to report a burglary and frame him, as she hid in a friend's unit across the hall to watch him enter. An innocent man had died that day, and I watched the whole thing.

I never forgot that moment of connection with another soul.

In my older life now, when I hold and kiss my lover, I make sure my lip bites leave a taste of my soul, and my eyes pierce her eyes when I first plunge slowly deep inside her.  Even though those moments may only take seconds, I make sure it feels like an eternity.

Have you ever watched or witness someone dying unexpectedly?

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